“BE WARY OF OUT OF AREA COMPANIES. CHECK WITH THE LOCAL BETTER BUSINESS BUREAU BEFORE YOU SEND ANY MONEY FOR FEES FOR SERVICES. READ AND UNDERSTAND ANY CONTRACTS BEFORE YOU SIGN. SHOP AROUND FOR RATES.”

@Header:Animals Lost & Found

@normal:***LOST CHOCOLATE LABRADOR*** Left home in Las Flores August 5th. Male 3 years old, neutered, gold eyes. I miss my baby so much. Call Alyson . 310-456-7151 or 310-456-7438.

@normal:FOUND DOG IN LAS FLORES CANYON. Reddish/brown Rhodesian Ridgeback/Pitbull mix, tall female with black face. Metal choke collar, no tags. Sweet disposition & VERY skinny. Call Alyson. 310-456-7438 or 310-456-7151.

@normal:LOST BLACK CAT. Neutered male. Extra claws in front. Lost in Las Flores area. We really, really miss him. 456-0400

@normal:LOST LARGE GRAY & WHITE DOMESTIC SHORT-HAIR CAT. Neutered. No front claws. Really fat. No collar. Please, please call 457-0617 or 457-6801 ext 248.

@Header:Animals

@Normal:AGOURA ANIMAL SHELTER needs towels and blankets. If you’ve lost a pet, please call the Shelter 818-991-0071.

@NORMAL:PLEASE SAVE LIVES and adopt. Many pure breed dogs and cats available to choose from as well as mixes. Pet Adoption Fund. 310-478-4455

@normal:**KING OF MALIBU DOG WALKER** Your dog will love it and will tell you all about it when you get home. 310-455-2311

@normal:TWO FREE MALE & FEMALE, SOUTH DOWN SHEEP & their best buddy, a pygmy goat. To a good home only. Call 818-222-7027.

@normal:FREE TO GOOD HOME ONLY. **World-class 1-year old male German Shepherd w/paper. ALSO **9 year old female black lab. Both great family dog. References a must. 714-505-0906

@normal:FREE TO GOOD HOME. Handsome cat. Siamese/Tabby. 1-1/2 years. Medium coat. Neutered, had all shots. Good companion & loves outdoors. Pictures by email. For adoption call 310-751-3873 after 2pm.

@normal:SCHNAUZER PUPPIES MINIATURE. Outstanding Champion Lines! Show & pet qualities. AKC. Lovingly home raised. Parents on premises. Rare black & silvers and salt & peppers. $600-$700. Call 805-588-7742.

@normal:MOVING – MUST GIVE AWAY TO GOOD HOME. 2 year old Wolf Hybrid, 85% wolf plus shepherd. . Must go loving home w/lot space. Gorgeous looks, excellent personality, house trained. 818-346-4534

@normal:**POSITIVE CANINE OBEDIENCE TRAINING** Private Lessons w/experienced handler. Specialize in Work Breeds. Serving Malibu & Westside. Weekend & evening appointments. Vet recommended. Affordable Rates. 310-457-0635

@Header:Announcements

@normal:**THE ARTIFAC TREE THRIFT SHOP**AT 3728-1/2 CROSS CREEK ROAD accepts donation of clothing, furniture, pictures, frames, jewelry, kitchen supplies, shoes, books, toys, linens, lamps, radios & TVs, gift items. DONATIONS TAX DEDUCTIBLE, PROCEEDS BENEFIT COMMUNITY. Call 456-1068 – Hours Monday-Friday – 10am-4pm.

@normal:FREE CONFERENCE CALLS. Up to 30 callers; business meetings, family, birthdays, friends, seminars. No sign-up fees, just normal long distance rates. Call conference one 1-518-242-6682. Cal*Scan

@Header:Antiques

@normal:FOR SALE. *Antique armoire, early 1900s, oak w/3 panels, oval mirror, 2 drawers. $1600. *Solid oak dining set, 42″ round w/18″ leaf, 4 arm chairs. $600. In Malibu evenings 310-589-0282

@Header:Architects

@normal:ARCHITECTS BUILDERS. Planning, design, permits, new construction & remodels, all phases. Residential, commercial. 310-753-6248. We will beat any legitimate bid. JBAIA @prodigy.net *BMX

@Header:Attorneys

@normal:***REAL ESTATE LAW – GRACE & ASSOCIATES*** Malibu’s newest law firm specializes in real estate law and transactions involving Malibu beach and canyon properties. 310-457-9058.

@normal:CRIMINAL ATTORNEY. DUI/failure to appear, domestic violence, white-collar crime, free consultation. SEAN ERENSTOFT. 310-820-0200 *BMX

@normal:ATTORNEY. Criminal defense. DUI/DMV hearings, misdemeanor/felonies, family law, divorces, child/spousal support, custody/visitation, post divorce modifications. Theodore A. Clapp 310-827-8477 *BMX

@Header:Autos

@normal:CARS: $100-$500. Police impounds. Honda, Chevy, Jeeps & Sport Utility. Must sell!!! 1-800-772-7470 Ext. 7108 Cal*Scan

@Header:Autos American

@normal:’92 MUSTANG 5.0, 5-speed hatchback, air, deluxe stereo, Lo-Jack. 68,500 pampered miles. $8,800 obo. Vicky, 310-208-6343

@normal:’91 FORD EXPLORER. White w/tan interior. 2WD. Excellent running condition. Original owner. 5-speed manual, V-6 engine, AM/FM cassette, A/C . Have all service records. $7,450. 310-457-1409

@Header:Autos Classics

@normal:1955 FORD PICK-UP CLASSIC. Fully restored, new engine, interior. All new glass, chrome, rubber. New tires, tow package, CD player, straight, beautiful, run great. Over $15,000 invested. Selling, $7,900 obo. 818-591-8777

@Header:Books

@normal:SPIRITUAL GIFTS & BOOKS ***SERRA RETREAT BOOK SHOPPE*** Open Monday through Saturday, 9:00 am-4:00 pm; Sunday, 9:00 am to 2:00 pm. Call 456-6631. 3401 Serra Road.

@normal:PLEASE HELP TO PUBLISH & PROMOTE, loan or grant, two spiritual books directed by God to write. One about communicating with God & the second one, communicating with our loved ones in Heaven. Most of the proceeds of these books will be given to feed starving little children. 310-712-2608.

@Header:Building Supplies

@normal:MALIBU MASONRY SUPPLY 3730 Cross Creek Road. 456-9444.

@normal:MALIBU LUMBER & HARDWARE Lumber, Garden, Housewares 23419 PCH 456-9031

@Header:Business Opportunities

@normal:ADVERTISE STATEWIDE! for $400. Place a 25-word classified ad in 200 California newspapers, combined circulation over 3.3 million. For information call The Malibu Times at 310-456-5507 and ask for Rae.

@normal:EARN A HOME/CONDO. Plus big profits sharing program with others. You are guaranteed to receive $95 CASH just by responding: ” More info needed; signing bonus.”CGE, 2065 West 6th Street, Suite 116-20, Los Angeles, CA 90057. Get a new computer/laptop offer!!

@normal:TOPANGA CANYON COFFEEHOUSE. Investor and/or buyer needed for nearly completed Topanga cafe. Great location, indoor/outdoor. Call Roy Buckman at 323-463-4877

@normal:LOCAL CANDY ROUTE. 30 vending machines. Earn approximately $800/day. All for $9,995. Call 1-800-998-VEND Cal*Scan

@normal:PAYPHONES. $150K/YR Lowest prices. Local sites available. Call 1-800-800-3470 (24/hrs). Cal*Scan

@normal:AMBITIOUS WOMAN SEEKING friendly, health conscious people to join my team. I earn more than $2,500/mo. working part-time from home. Call toll free 1-888-819-6020 Cal*Scan

@normal:ARE YOU EARNING $20,000 per ? I need help! Overwhelmed with leads. Not MLM. In your area. 1-800-322-6169 Ext 0878. Cal*Scan

@normal:ATTITUDE + $$$ Earn $2,000+/week. Proven Turn-key system, not Mlm. 24 hr. info call 800-345-9688 est. 1521. Cal*Scan

@normal:”BETTER THAN AOL” USA Today. Try the best internet connection service, the first month is free. Call toll free 1-800-355-4430 for a 24 hr. free recorded message. Cal*Scan

@normal:EARN $2,000+ PER WEEK from anywhere in the trillion $$ travel industry. Not MLM! Call toll free: (800)345-9688 ext 0296. Cal*Scan

@normal:EARN CASH NOW!! Are you earning what you are worth/ If not call 1-800-600-0343 ext. 1277. 24 hours. Cal*Scan

@normal:GREAT BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY! Earn top $$$. Up to 50% commission. FREE information booklet. Call: 800-353-9984. log onto: www.ihbn.com access code: F1213. Cal*Scan

@Header:Cabinetry

@normal:FINE CUSTOM CABINETRY and FURNITURE. Design, Fabrication, Installation. Home Theater Specialist. Providing special woodwork since 1978. Lic: #471584. **CASEY DESIGN** 818-706-3147.

@Header:Chef/Cook

@normal:CUSTOM CUISINE LOWFAT gourmet meals delivered to your home – Weekly Meal Plans. Healthy, delicious menus averaging only 5 fat grams per entree. Delivered in convenient, portable microwave containers. Local references. 310-915-5342

@Header:Child Care

@normal:MALIBU MAMAS Nannies, housekeepers, couples etc. Serving Malibu since 1988. 10% discount to Guild Members. Owned by a WGA Member. 456-8113.

@normal:L.A. NANNIES & DOMESTICS. Nannies, Housekeepers, Chefs, Baby Nurses & Personal Assistants, etc. Malibu owned and operated. 21355 PCH #202. 317-8555.

@normal:THE STORK STOPS HERE a postpartum care service, Baby Nurses, Postpartum Doulas, Mommies, Personal shoppers and Gourmet cooking service. Early scheduling is encouraged to ensure availability. 310-226-2845.

@Header:Computer Services

@Normal:COMPUTER SERVICES. Learn to be proficient in Windows. *Word processing – MS Word & WordPerfect *Accounting – Quicken & QuickBooks *Spreadsheets – Excel & Lotus *Internet – Netscape & E-Mail. Expert, Friendly Instruction at Reasonable Rates. Individual lessons with your computer or ours. 310-456-9706 or 818-991-2871

@Header:Construction Services

@normal:HMH CONSTRUCTION Remodels and Custom Painting. Quality work. 310-589-5711

@normal:***4 SEASONS CONSTRUCTION*** Remodels & Home Improvement. Concrete – Retaining – Foundations. Block Wall, Stone, Brick Work. 800-418-4243 or 818-780-6201

@Header:Domestic Help

@normal:PILES INTO FILES. Have you been meaning to organize your home office, kitchen or other rooms in your house. I help people get organized. Please call Julie, pager/voice mail. 310-286-8739

@Header:Educational

@normal:EARN ACCREDITED COLLEGE degree quickly! Bachelors, masters, doctorate by correspondence based upon life experiences, knowledge already attained, prior education & short study course. For FREE information catalog, phone Cambridge State University 800-964-8316. Cal*Scan

@Header:Electrician

@normal:O’NEILL ELECTRIC. Specializing in new construction, panel upgrades, remodel additions. All aspects of residential, commercial, electrical work. Free estimates. License #628772. 818-735-4986 *BMX

@Header:Employment Wanted

@normal:ARE LOOKING FOR AN EXPERIENCED EXECUTIVE PERSONAL ASSISTANT? Intelligent, Mature, Responsible, Organized & Dependable. Worked for prominent Hollywood couples in their Beverly Hills, Santa Monica homes. Extensive administrative duties included scheduling appointments, making travel arrangements, handling press requests, running errands. Frequent interaction w/accountants, lawyers, agents, people from all levels of restaurant, television, film & music industry. Coordinated household maintenance, including pet care, children’s activity, w/staff of nanny, housekeeper, gardener. Computer literate. Seasoned traveler. Excellent references. Please call 310-937-4775.

@normal:**ALL AROUND ASSISTANT** Reliable, dependable w/all your office & home needs. Excellent w/house & pet care. Malibu resident w/Malibu experience. 310-456-7870

@normal:ASSEMBLE ARTS, CRAFTS, TOYS, jewelry, wood items, typing, sewing, computer work from home in your spare time. Great pay. Free details call 1-800-632-8007, 24 hrs. Cal*Scan

@normal:HOME TYPIST/PC USERS. Steady work. Full-time/Part-time $45,000 per year earning potential. Call toll free 1-800-883-0819 ext. T-400. Cal*Scan

@normal:GET PAID $15 – $30 per hour processing insurance claims for local doctor’s office. Complete training provided. Computer & modem required. Call 800-942-8141 ext. 6. Cal*Scan

@normal:$800 WEEKLY POTENTIAL processing Government refunds at home. No experience necessary. 1-800-966-3599 ext 1847. Cal*Scan

@normal:WORK IN YOUR spare time! Good Money! Processing mail! Free supplies! Bonuses! Rush SASE: Greenhouse/4217 Highland, Waterford, MI 48328-2165. Cal*Scan

@Header:Financing Needed

@normal:PLEASE HELP TO PUBLISH & PROMOTE, loan or grant, two spiritual books directed by God to write. One about communicating with God & the second one, communicating with our loved ones in Heaven. Most of the proceeds of these books will be given to feed starving little children. 310-712-2608.

@Header:Finances

@normal:AVOID BANKRUPTCY. Debt Consolidation. Stop collection calls. Cut monthly payments to 50%. Eliminate finance charges. Fast approval! 1-800-270-9894. Cal*Scan

@normal:“CASH.” Immediate $$ for structured settlements and deferred insurance claims & lotteries. J.G. Wentworth: toll free 1-888-231-5375. Cal*Scan

@normal:CASH NOW FOR Future Payments! We buy payments from Insurance settlements, annuities, Casino Winnings. We also buy Owner Finance Mortgage Notes. R & P Capital Resources. 1-800-338-5815. Cal*Scan

@normal:ARE YOU DROWNING in debt? Debt relief-free, immediate, confidential. Consolidate payments, lower interest. Call toll free 1-888-BILL-FREE or (888)245-5373. American Credit Counselors, nonprofit. Cal*Scan

@normal:GET OUT OF debt free!! Credit Counseling Centers of America (member NFFCC). Free debt consolidation, lower payments, interest. Stop collector calls. Non-profit 1-877-936-2222. Toll Free Cal*Scan

@normal:A DEBT-FREE LIFE! Confidential help. Cut monthly payments. Reduce interest. Stop collection calls. Avoid bankruptcy. Nation’s largest nonprofit: Genus Credit Management. 800-892-2953 (24 hours) Cal*Scan

@normal:$$$ OVERDUE BILLS? Credit problems? Try debt consolidation! Combine all bills into one low payment. No application fees!! (800)863-9006 ext.103. Cal*Scan

@normal:AVOID BANKRUPTCY. Free debt consolidation. Application w/service. Cut payments to 65%. 24 hr. approval. Good/Bad/No credit OK. 1-800-873-8207. Cal*Scan

@normal:$CASH FOR MORTGAGES$ If you are receiving payments on a mortgage, we can convert them to immediate cash. Twenty years experience. Highest prices. 800-676-3500. Cal*Scan

@normal:OVER YOUR HEAD IN DEBT! Credit cards/bills? Cut payments up to $60%!! *Maintain good credit. 8 free consultation 800-556-1548. www.anewhorizon.cor Member BBB, non-profit National Co. Cal*Scan

@Header:Firewood

@normal:**FIREWOOD** Eucalyptus, avocado or sycamore. Well-aged & cut/split in convenient sizes. $95 per cord. $55 per half cord. We will help you load it into your vehicle. 310-456-3230

@normal:FIREWOOD Hardwood – Eucalyptus and Macadamia. Delivered and stacked. Half cord: $175.00, Whole cord $300.00. 457-2613.

@normal:FREE CUT FIREWOOD!!. You pick up. Dry seasoned. 457-7279

@Header:Flea Market

@normal:HAVE YOU ADVERTISED IN OUR “FLEA MARKET” YET?? IF NOT, JUST GIVE US A CALL & WE WILL BE GLAD TO RUN YOUR AD; OR WE WILL RENEW IT. 456-5507 Ext. 108 or Fax 456-8986

@normal:SURFING, windsurfing equipment. First $100 takes all. 457-1171

@normal:ELECTRIC Mini Magic Muffin Maker. Betty Crocker. $7. 829-1568

@normal:MASSAGER for back w/heat & adjustments. Pollenex. $25. 838-4192

@normal:LIGHT FIXTURE COVERS, 6 assorted glass globes. $11. 829-1568

@normal:VAPORIZER, “Devilbiss” works fine. $5. 829-1568

@normal:CRUTCHES, aluminum. Adjustable. $10. 829-1568

@normal:FIREWOOD EUCALYPTUS, AVOCADO. $95 CORD. $55 HALF CORD. YOU PICK UP. 310-456-3230

@normal:GOLF BAGS. 2, leather. Titlest 1st or bullet golf. Each $99. 456-1421

@normal:CHRISTMAS ITEMS. Centerpiece, tins, miscellaneous stuff. All for $15. 829-1568.

@normal:EXERCISE EQUIPMENT. Zinkin Total Fitness Machine. $60. 457-6378

@normal:SLIDE VIEWER. New in box. $70. 457-6378

@normal:SHUTTERS. Pair. 4’x16′. White wood. $100. 457-6378

@normal:BOOKS,Complete set Time-Life series on Photography. $40. 457-6378

@normal:WEDDING DRESS. New, never worn, size 8, beautiful. $400 obo. 310-455-3234

@normal:TEMPERED DECK GLASS. Up to 45″x76″ sheets. FREE!! 589-4841

@normal:HOUSE PLANTS Moving must sell! 7′ palms $20.00 456-2200

@normal:TREADMILL Like new $95.00 310-456-2200.

@normal:COLLECTABLES Old Rock & Roll Posters, Framed $75.00 310-456-2200

@normal:COMPUTER, Pentium w/CDRom, speakers, color monitor, fax modem. $499. 589-2823

@normal:PIANO. Schaeffer, 1950s. Needs work. $25. 456-6138

@normal:SKIS, Powder skis, “Rossignol” 185 w/bindings. Brand new. $400. 457-1537

@Header:Flooring

@normal:VIKING FLOORS Specializing in Installation & Finishing of all types of flooring. 457-7823.

@Header:Flower Services

@normal:WE SELL FRESH FLOWERS direct from the flower market! Every Monday 9am-12pm. 1911 Newell Rd., Malibu 317-0378. Holiday wreaths will be available, too!

@Header:For Sale

@normal:FOR SALE!. Magnificent free-form redwood pedestal table, 52″x82″. Comparable $4,000. Selling for $1,200 obo. Turn-of-century partners’ desk, 48″x72″, very unique. $1,500. 486 PC + monitor, $600. Call Chris @ 456-6181

@normal:DOUBLE WIDE MOBILE HOME. 1400′, 2 bedroom, 2 bath. Huge living room w/fireplace. Big kitchen w/skylights. Laundry room. Dining room, office. Beautiful design. Must see. Must be moved. $30,000 obo. 323-876-0515

@normal:***GRAND UPRIGHT PIANO***. Good condition, perfect for students. Moving & needs a loving home. $1,000 obo. Please call 457-7647

@normal:MAPLE PLANK FLOORING. 8900 sq. ft. 90 years old. Never sanded. Tongue & groove. Beautiful patina. 1 inch thick by 3-1/4 inch wide. $2.45 sq. ft. 310-457-1469 *BMX

@normal:***”MACA MIRACLE “**. 100% natural! New ONE-STEP nutriceutical diet. Lose weight & discover good health! MACA herb reduces stress. No harmful stimulants. Easy to carry packets. Samples available. 310-589-5800

@normal:FOR SALE living room & dining room sets. Sofa, loveseat, 2 armchairs. Dining table, chairs, china. Perfect condition. 310-589-0665

@normal:FOR SALE. *Antique armoire, early 1900s, oak w/3 panels, oval mirror, 2 drawers. $1600. *Solid oak dining set, 42″ round w/18″ leaf, 4 arm chairs. $600. In Malibu evenings 310-589-0282

@NORMAL:WOLFF TANNING BEDS. TAN AT HOME Buy direct and SAVE. Commercial/Home units from $199.00. Low monthly payments. Free color catalog. Call today. 1-800-842-1310 Cal*Scan

@Header:Garage Sales

@normal:WHEN YOU ADVERTISE WITH THE MALIBU TIMES you will receive FREE Garage Sale signs & arrows. Call us at 456-5507 Ext.108 to place your Garage Sale Classified Ad.

@normal:LOTS OF GREAT STUFF! Children’s items, clothing, dishes, kitchen items, etc. Sat/Sun, 11/7 & 11/8, 9am-3pm. No early birds. 3931 LAS FLORES CANYON RD. (Across from Duke’s).

@normal:BLOW OUT SALE!! Designer clothing, shoes & jewelry. New & used. Prada, Gucci, Chanel & more. Sunday Only. Nov. 8th, 9am. 6471 SYCAMORE MEADOWS. No early birds please.

@Header:Glass

@normal:MALIBU GLASS & Mirror & Screens 3547 Winter Canyon Road. 456-1844.

@normal:BEVELED GLASS WORKS. Beveled, Leaded & Carved Glass doors, Windows & Entryways. Catalogue Available. 457-5252 home.sprynet.com/sprynet/bgw01

@Header:Handmade Crafts

@normal:PERSONALIZE YOUR CHILD’S OR BABY’S living space with unique handmade dolls, quilts, curtains, hooked rugs, chair covers, mobiles, diaper stackers, etc. Available with family pictures and/or child’s name. 818-832-9634

@Header:Handyman

@NORMAL:A to Z HOME IMPROVEMENTS. No job too large or too small. Carpentry, painting, tile, retaining walls, decks, masonry, dog houses, and more. Honest, reasonable, reliable. Local references. Bill 317-2221

@Header:Health & Fitness

@normal:**YOGA IN MALIBU** Take time for yourself….relaxing, rejuvenating, challenging. Rediscover your body & soul. Privates available in peaceful setting!! Call Kirschen (Certified Yoga Instructor) at 310-589-3916

@normal:***”MACA MIRACLE “**. 100% natural! New ONE-STEP nutriceutical diet. Lose weight & discover good health! MACA herb reduces stress. No harmful stimulants. Easy to carry packets. Samples available. 310-589-5800

@normal:**LADIES EXERCISE IN PRIVATE SETTING** with experienced trainer. Location in West Malibu. Specializing in women’s needs. Call Carol at 310-457-1681

@normal:LOSE UP TO 10 POUNDS NEXT WEEKEND AND GET PAID. Jump start your diet or finally break that plateau. Looking for men & women to participate in a 2-day diet program. No pills. Safe and effective. Nothing to buy, in fact we pay you to lose! Call 310-587-8892 Today.

@normal:GREAT NEWS! DIABETICS Medicare pays for testing supplies. You’ve seen us on TV. Liberty Medical Supply. No up front costs. Satisfaction Guaranteed. Free Shipping. 1-800-819-4030 Cal*Scan

@Header:Help Wanted

@normal:EXPERIENCED INTERIOR PLANT TECHNICIAN. Must have valid CA driver’s license & insurance. Must speak fluent English. 457-1625

@normal:SECURITY GUARD. Unarmed. Watch the waves & get paid. $6.25 per hour. 457-4305

@normal:EXPERIENCED EXTERIOR LANDSCAPE SUPERVISOR. Must have good references, truck, insurance, valid California driver’s license and speak fluent English. 457-1625 x4.

@normal:LOCAL ANIMAL HOSPITAL needs animal caretaker. 8:00am to 3:00pm. Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday & Saturday. Will train, negotiable. 457-6453.

@normal:HIGHEST PAID FOR QUALITY DRIVER/MOVER. Class A/B with clean driving record only. Inventory & Van Line experience a must. References required. Contact Cindy at 310-450-5957

@normal:**LONDON TEMPORARY SERVICES** Lots of great jobs: Receptionist, Administrative Assistants, Clerks, Secretaries. One year experience required. Fax resume: 310-826-7939. Work on the Westside.

@normal:CUSTOMER SERVICE REPS. Excellent communication skills required for this Temp to Staff position. Prior work history within a call center is preferred, but not required. Must have strong customer service skills & some general office experience. $10-$12/hours. **Royal Staffing Services** Westlake Village, 805-373-9909, Fax 805-494-4365

@normal:BUSY MALIBU ANSWERING SERVICE needs an all night operator. Light typing & pleasant speaking voice a must. Call 310-317-2195 for more information.

@normal:UNIVERSAL GROUP MALIBU DISTRICT is seeking DYNAMIC individuals with a potential for growth in the revenue collection systems. All candidates must have 2 years of hands-on managerial experience & basic computer knowledge. Please forward resume & salary expectations to Regional Manager, 23233 N. Pima Rd. 113#333, Scottsdale, AZ. 85255

@normal:**MEDICAL RECEPTIONIST** for Malibu family practice. Medical front office experience is required. Excellent salary & benefits. Fax resume to: 310-391-4654.

@normal:WORK FROM HOME – EARN EXTRA INCOME. $800-$3500 PT/FT. Call 1-800-714-5653 for free information or log on to http://www.hbn.com and please use the access code 5819 *BMX

@normal:SALES/INSIDE. Experienced phone salesperson needed to sell exclusive service to auto dealers nationally. $2000/month guaranteed. Commission average $4K-$6K/month. Great benefits, health insurance, parking 401K, high-energy atmosphere. Call Amer. 310-642-3785 *BMX

@normal:WHITEGOLD PRODUCTIONS is looking for strange, off-beat and out-of-the-ordinary fun people who can act for a feature length film. No experience necessary. Please send resume & photo to: Tom Skelfo, P. O. Box 32181, Long Beach, Ca 90830-2181 *BMX

@normal:HANDYMAN REQUIRED for residential estate. Must be skilled craftsman in carpentry, electrical, drywall, painting & plumbing. Guesthouse available in exchange for work. 310-276-5900

@normal:**THE MALIBU TIMES** is looking for a part-time Advertising Salesperson to sell special sections. Salary plus commission. Sales experience preferred. Call Rae at 310-456-5507, Ext 108 or fax your resume to 310-456-8986

@normal:BOOKKEEPER. Part-time or full-time. Fast-paced marketing company. Peachtree literate desirable. Bondable, Call 310-457-6937. Fax resume to: 310-457-6518

@normal:FULL-CHARGE BOOKKEEPER. Hospitality industry experience preferred. Excellent salary & benefits. Malibu area. Send resume to: “BOOKKEEPER”, c/o The Malibu Times, P. O. Box 1127, Malibu, CA. 90265.

@normal:RESTAURANT LOOKING FOR BOOKKEEPER. Will train, flexible hours. Call 456-3132 or fax: 456-0492

@normal:THE MALIBU TIMES (www.malibutimes.com) is looking for an intern to work on our Web site & help develop our marketing program. We need a Web savvy techie, interested in journalism, marketing & promotion. Call the publisher Arnold G. York, 456-5507 Ext 101

@normal:ARE YOU A NEWS HOUND! The Malibu Times is looking for experienced reporters with an itch to cover government & fast-breaking stories. Call Arnold York, publisher at 456-5507 ext 101 or for immediate consideration fax clips to 456-8986

@normal:PART-TIME HOMEWORK HELPER/DRIVER for 10 year old boy. Monday thru Thursday. 3pm to 7pm. $8/hour. Local references, CA driver’s license & insurance required. Phone 310-456-7707

@normal:PART-TIME PERSONAL ASSISTANT. Organized, energetic, computer skills, light bookkeeping. Flexible day hours. Local references, experience needed. $8/hour. 10-20 hours per week. Call 318-878-9002, fax resume 310-878-9097 *BMX

@normal:FULL CHARGE BOOKKEEPER. Local licensed professional with over 15 years experience in general ledger. Financial statements, bank recs, payroll review, audit, organization & administrative skills. Can work onsite or home. 310-829-1925. References on request. *BMX

@normal:WILDLIFE JOBS TO $21.60/HOUR. Inc. benefits. Game wardens, security, maintenance, park rangers. No experience needed. For appointment & exam info, call 1-800-818-3585 ext 0703, 8am-7pm, 7 days fds inc *BMX

@normal:POSTAL JOBS TO $18.35/HOUR. Inc. benefits, no experience. For app. & exam info, call 1-800-813-3585, ext. 0702, 8am-7pm, 7 days fds,inc *BMX

@normal:RECEPTIONIST & SECRETARY for Music/Record & Video Company. Must be computer literate + multi-task. EOE. Fax resume/references & salary history to 310-457-5382.

@normal:DRIVER. FLATBED MILES. Money. Hometime. Start 34 cents/mile. Run western or 1-5 corridor. Great benefits. Consistent miles. 3 years OTR + 1 year flatbed. Combined Transport. 1-800-637-4407. Cal*Scan

@normal:GOVERNMENT JOBS. Now hiring in your area. $16,000-$68,000. Call 1-800-883-0819 ext J-400 for current Federal County, City & State lists. Cal*Scan

@normal:$1000 WEEKLY stuffing envelopes at home. Free details. Rush (long self-addressed, stamped envelope) to ACE, Dept. 503. P. O. box 5769, Diamond Bar, CA 91765 Cal*Scan

@normal:AVON PRODUCTS-Start your own business. Work flexible hours. Enjoy unlimited earnings. Call toll free (888)561-2866. Cal*Scan

@normal:CO. SPONSORED TRAINING & 1st year income $30K – Stevens Transport – OTR truck drivers wanted! Non-experienced or experienced – Toll free 888-279-4058 EOE. Cal*Scan

@normal:DRIVER COVENANT TRANSPORT $1,000 sign-on bonus for Exp. Company Drivers 1-800-441-4394. Owner Operators – Call toll free 1-888-667-3729. Bud Meyer Truck Lines Refrigerated Hauling call toll free 1-877-283-6393 Solo Drivers & Contractors. Cal*Scan

@normal:JIM PALMER TRUCKING. Teams & O/O. Team up with the #1 team in trucking today. We are the good looking fleet. Call 1-800-548-3110 Cal*Scan

@Header:Holiday Gift Boutique

@normal:CHRISTMAS & HANNUKAH. Pinafores, aprons, bibs, boy’s vests & pants. Thanksgiving & New Year’s football patterns also. Custom homemade dolls, quilts, stuffed animals. Can be personalized with names & pictures. 818-832-9634

@Header:Home Care

@normal:CAREGIVER/CARETAKER. Gent will drive, cook, shop, garden & enable with dignity. Part or full time. Please call Joe at 317-2082

@Header:Housecleaning

@normal:HOUSECLEANING. Available 4 days a week & weekends. Experience, self starter. Speaks English, own transportation. Local references. 310-455-1991 or 818-348-3422.

@Header:Housesitting

@normal:**SECURITY, HOUSESITTING, ANIMAL CARE** for your home or estate in exchange for living accommodations. Non-smoking, non-drinking, college degree, trustworthy. Impeccable references. Contact David at 310-375-2781

@Header:Instructional

@normal:TUTORING. Professional educational tutor. Emphasis on foundations of learning. 3Rs & phonics. Study & organizational skills, homework in a calm, patient atmosphere. 20 years experience. 457-3106.

@Header:Internet Service

@normal:AT LAST! INTERNET NOW WITHOUT A COMPUTER! Save over $1200 in expenses, a new, exciting, really cool way to have a blast with family & friends! FREE info. Ask for EZ Net 310-317-0887

@Header:Investors Needed

@normal:SEEKING POSSIBLE INVESTORS in gold & silver production in Central America. Send $25 for more info to: Robert Sinclair, 9663 Santa Monica Blvd, #280, Beverly Hills, CA 90210 *BMX

@Header:Investors Wanted

@normal:PLEASE HELP TO PUBLISH & PROMOTE, loan or grant, two spiritual books directed by God to write. One about communicating with God & the second one, communicating with our loved ones in Heaven. Most of the proceeds of these books will be given to feed starving little children. 310-712-2608.

@normal:TOPANGA CANYON COFFEEHOUSE. Investor and/or buyer needed for nearly completed Topanga cafe. Great location, indoor/outdoor. Call Roy Buckman at 323-463-4877

@normal:INVEST IN MY FUTURE! Please donate to a Pepperdine student who is working full-time to pay college tuition with no help. 310-721-8738

@Header:Landscaping

@Normal:MALIBU PLANTSCAPING. Interior & Exterior plant care design and maintenance. Call 310-457-1625.

@normal:Malibu Tropicals and Succulent Nursery specializing in succulents, bromeliads, epidendrum orchids, exotics for landscape use. 1 gal. to 24″ box specimens. Wholesale to the trade. 26799 P.C.H., Malibu. Hours 7:00-3:30 M-F. Call for appointment 310-457-7478.

@Header:Lost & Found

@normal:FREE LOST & FOUND ADS. Have you lost a pet or found an article? Please call our Classified Dept. at 456-5507 Ext 108 and we will be glad to take your classified ad at NO CHARGE.

@Header:Mobile Homes

@normal:DOUBLE WIDE MOBILE HOME. 1400′, 2 bedroom, 2 bath. Huge living room w/fireplace. Big kitchen w/skylights. Laundry room. Dining room, office. Beautiful design. Must see. Must be moved. $30,000 obo. 323-876-0515

@normal:2 MOBILE HOMES FOR SALE. 3 bedroom, 1 bath. 67’x13′ In good condition. $9,000. **2 bedroom, 1 bath. 42’x 12′. New concrete siding. New stove. $2,500. 310-457-3899

@Header:Musical Instruction

@normal:MUSIC – PIANO – VOICE – INSTRUCTION. Voice Production: Speech Coach, Diction, Projection, Speech & Language Pronunciation. Local professional Malibu instructor. Please call & indicate your interest. 310-280-3406

@Header:Musical Instruments

@normal:***GRAND UPRIGHT PIANO***. Good condition, perfect for students. Moving & needs a loving home. $1,000 obo. Please call 457-7647

@Header:Office Space

@NORMAL:ZUMA TERRACE 29350 PCH unit #12. 1,150 square foot office w/private entry & patio, plus private bath, in garden setting. Lots of glass. $2,200/month inclusive. 457-3602.

@normal:SMALL OFFICE SPACE AVAILABLE on PCH in heart of Malibu. 200 sq. ft. Parking. Call Agent, Elsie Muslin, 456-6431 ext 311.

@normal:MALIBU OFFICE SPACE for lease in prime location. Miramar building. Call manager 310-456-0063

@Header:Painting

@normal:**THE FAUX ‘HO** Certified interior designer specializes in decorative paint finishes for every surface of your home or office. Standard painting services also available. Call Patricia at 323-874-0937 or 323-854-0848

@normal:QUALITY PAINTING. Exterior & interior. Residential & commercial. Complete preparation. Free estimates! Low prices! License #692903 Call Nesha 818-980-9573 *BMX

@Header:Party Services

@normal:

• ***BEAR TO BEAR BALLOONS***
• Balloons & Bouquets for all Occasions. Now carrying BEANIE BABIES 21217 Pacific Coast Highway & Rambla Pacifico. Malibu. Call 456-9746.

@Header:Picture Framing

@normal:MALIBU GALLERY Serving Malibu’s picture framing and art collector needs since 1981. Colony Plaza (near Ralph’s). 310-456-5393.

@Header:Plumbing

@normal:McDERMOTT PLUMBING & PUMPING Residential, commercial. Call on us to handle what ever comes up. 24-hour emergency service. Plumbing 456-2286, Pumping 456-1173

@Header:Private Investigator

@normal:PRIVATE EYE FOR HIRE! Discrete and confidential. Call Paris Stone P.I. Specializing in cheating and divorce. 818-340-ISPY (4779). 24 Hours. e-mail: coolspy@earthlink.net. Web: www.parisindustries.com/pi.html

@Header:Real Estate

@normal:EXCEPTIONAL FIND ON MALIBU ROAD! 3 bedroom, 2 bath completely remodeled top to bottom. Vaulted ceiling, skylights, all rooms w/sliding doors w/plantation shutters opening to deck w/ 180 ¡ spectacular ocean view. Marble fireplace, gourmet kitchen. Spacious & open floor plan. Seller relocating, must sell. STEAL AT $699,000.Adjacent lot also available. ***Regal Properties, Inc.****** Ask for Benik. 310-275-8888

@normal:MINUTES TO MALIBU! 4 bedrooms, 3 baths. Tennis court, pool, waterfall, horse facilities, nearly 3/4 acre. Two massive fireplaces, artist studio, paver tiles, high beam & vaulted ceilings. $599,950. Broker 818-731-0739.

@normal:PACIFIC PALISADES CONDO. 2+1.75. Partial ocean views. Heated pool, gated, 2-car parking. Great location to shops. Bright & sunny. Hardwood floors plus new tile flooring. New refrigerator, mirrors. Avoid traffic on PCH. Front patio. $325,000. 310-454-2480. Agent

@normal:AGOURA HILLS. 1/2 acre horse property. Home w/5BR, 4BA, 4-car garage. Separate office or playhouse. Ranch style w/wood burning stove. 5 minutes to horse tails, scenic view. Las Virgenes School District. $444,000. Broker. 818-879-9100, Wanda/Nona

@normal:LOS CABOS BEACH FRONT VILLA. 3 suites plus detached Studio Villa, East Cape, Los Barriles, Mexico. Huge 1/2 acre landscaped estate. $798,000 turn key furnished, OWC. 805-594-1088, color brochure www.gocortez.com/villa.html Have friends & family? Make your own time share!!

@normal:4+2.5 VIEW, NORTH TOPANGA CANYON. Upgraded. Atrium entrance to foyer w/skylight. Master suite separate wing. Park-like garden w/hot tub, deck, playhouse. Beautiful area, minutes to PCH or 101. $465,000. 818-704-0156

@normal:GOVERNMENT FORECLOSED HOMES. Pennies on the $1. Repro’s, VA, HUD, Sheriff sales. No money down government loans available now. Local listings. Toll Free 1-800-669-2292 ext. H-4000. Cal*Scan

@normal:NO DOWNPAYMENT?? PROBLEM credit? Own the home you need now, without a big down payment. Complete financing is qualified. DeGeorge Home Alliance 1-800-343-2884. Cal*Scan

@normal:COLORADO LAND – FALL SALE! 10 acres w/waterlines & utilities. Was: $54,900. Now: $29,900. over 50 great new deals. Woodlands, mtn. views, streams, ponds & lg. acreage. Easy financing. No closing costs. Full guarantees. Call now. 1-970-882-7707 RSL Cal*Scan

@normal:40 ACRE RANCH-$27,900. Views of Grand Canyon & San Fran peaks. Perfect 4 seasons climate at 6, 100 ft. elev. Rolling land w/trees. Financing. AZLR toll free 1-877-244-8439. Cal*Scan

@normal:NORTHWEST ARIZONA two ranches 39 acres – $14,900 and 80 acres – $29,900 or both. Convenient to I-40. Good water area. Gorgeous views. Call AZLR 1-888-244-5263. Cal*Scan

@Header:Rentals

@normal: OCEAN VIEW, WOOD & GLASS APARTMENT, 2.5 bedrooms, 2 baths, Pt. Dume area. Large deck. garage. Washer/dryer. Under 1,800 sq. ft. $2,000/month. 457-3106

@normal:SMALL TRAILER IN RUSTIC, CHARMING CANYON SETTING on Encinal Canyon Rd. Secluded 7 acre property. 2 miles from ocean. $495/month 310-457-0877

@normal:MALIBU ROAD, 2 BEDROOM, 2 BATH. Newly renovated, nicely furnished classic beach pad w/views from Palos Verdes to Pt. Dume. 50′ balcony on sandy beach. Walls of glass, beamed ceilings, beautiful kitchen w/butcher block counter. Laundry facilities. $3,495/month. Principals only. 310-659-2500

@normal:DRY PRIVATE SANDY BEACH: Deluxe 2 bedrooms, 2 baths, office, fireplace, new appliances, cedar walls, Mexican paver floor tiles, 900 sq. ft. deck. Garage. Quiet/private. Close-in. $4,000/month. Long-term. Call 310-456-2348

@normal:HAWAII IN MALIBU, PANORAMIC OCEAN VIEW ESTATE, walk to beach. 3 gated acres w/full-time security, 4 bedroom, 3 baths, tennis court, pool. $5,996/month Cariker & Associates 310-457-5500. Broker Cooperation.

@normal:HOUSE FOR RENT IN MALIBU COVE COLONY. “Largest beach on the street.” 2 bedroom, 2 baths. New kitchen, Sauna. Gated 24 hours/day security guard. $5,500/month. 323-937-5121

@normal:CLOSE IN, SUNNY, NEW 2 BEDROOM, 2 BATH APARTMENT. Ocean & mountain views. Washer/dryer, microwave, dishwasher, refrigerator. Available 11/24/98. $1,700/month. 310-456-6311.

@normal:SPECTACULAR 3 BEDROOM, 2 BATH TOWNHOUSE. 2-car garage w/extra parking. Upgraded flooring throughout. New kitchen w/new appliances. Washer/dryer, refrigerator. Pool/spa. Walk to beach. Patio w/Koi pond. No pets. Security system. Partially furnished. $3,200/month. Agent 310-454-2480

@normal:HOUSE FOR LEASE/RENT. Magnificent Malibu whitewater views! Sophisticated Fung Shui 2BD/1.5 bath corner townhome. Private garden/spa, fireplace, hardwood floors, gourmet kitchen, Japanese bath, washer/dryer. Dramatic architectural remodel. Private beach club/tennis/pool! Year lease $2,950/month unfurnished. Short-term $3,950/month furnished. 310-457-0450

@normal:CHARMING 3 BEDROOM, 2 bath. Huge deck, ocean view. Fireplace. Completely remodeled, large kitchen, new baths, new paint/carpets. $3,000/month. 457-8182 or 457-6160.

@normal:HANDYMAN REQUIRED for residential estate. Must be skilled craftsman in carpentry, electrical, drywall, painting & plumbing. Guesthouse available in exchange for work. 310-276-5900

@normal:MALIBOU LAKE. Beautiful mountain/lake views newly remodeled guest studio nestled in the pines in rustic setting. French doors, travertine custom kitchen & bath. Serious professional. Cat OK. $1,000/month. 818-991-4453

@normal:ON THE BEACH large open 1 bedroom, 1 bath apartment. Vaulted closet, walk-in closet, new carpet. Private entry, large balcony. Beach access. $2,000/month. 310-245-1231

@normal:QUAINT STUDIO COTTAGE on equestrian property in Serra Canyon. Studio is 12′ x 14′ w/kitchenette plus full bath. Mountain view, no dogs. Excellent credit history & references required. $700/month. 310-456-3230

@normal:4 BEDROOM ON THE BEACH. Gated, furnished, light & bright. Near county line. $2,950/month. 310-748-1432

@normal:OCEAN VIEWS. PCH address. 2000 sq. ft. 3 bedrooms, 2.5 baths. Vaulted ceilings, see-through fireplace. Contemporary kitchen w/Subzero. Wrap-around deck. Hot tub. $2,900/month, utilities included. Pets ok. 457-9799

@normal:HOUSE FOR RENT. 3 bedrooms, 2 bath. Wet bar, new paint/carpet, open beamed-ceilings throughout. Quiet, seclude El Nido. No pets. $2,2000/month. 456-8585

@Header:Room For Rent

@normal:POINT DUME ROOMS FOR RENT Share 3 bedroom beautifully furnished home. Full house privileges. Pool, laundry, security. Prefer female. No smoking, no pets. $650/month. 457-3006

@Header:Rental Wanted

@normal:RENTAL WANTED FOR OUR WEDDING. One week rental of ocean front/view house w/patio or deck large enough for small family wedding. Projected dates 6/7/99-6/14/99. Contact Mike at 818-505-6885

@Header:Retail Space

@normal:MALIBU PACIFIC COAST HIGHWAY, 480-900 sq. ft. retail store with high visibility frontage. 310-456-7031 ext 175.

@Header: Scripts

@normal:SCRIPT READER/STORY EDITOR to work out out of your production/home. Reliable, excellent writer, speedy delivery, samples available. Extensive experience. 310-937-4097

@Header:Services

@normal:LETTER PERFECT: Letters, Resumes, Scripts, Manuscripts, Legal, Word Processing, Fax services available. Also, Computer Lessons, Learn Windows 95, & E-mail. Contact Karen 310-456-8625.

@normal:TURN PILES INTO FILES. Have you been meaning to organize your home office, kitchen or other rooms in your house. I help people get organized. Please call Julie, pager/voice mail. 310-286-8739

@normal:**KING OF MALIBU DOG WALKER** Your dog will love it and will tell you all about it when you get home. 310-455-2311

@normal:INTERIOR PLANT CARE. Service with a personal touch. New plants & container gardens for your home & work-place! Free estimates & affordable prices! For your appointment call Carol “B”, Your Plant Lady 310-286-5689 *BMX

@normal:AT LAST! INTERNET NOW WITHOUT A COMPUTER! Save over $1200 in expenses, a new, exciting, really cool way to have a blast with family & friends! FREE info. Ask for EZ Net 310-317-0887

@normal:ARE LOOKING FOR AN EXPERIENCED EXECUTIVE PERSONAL ASSISTANT? Intelligent, Mature, Responsible, Organized & Dependable. Worked for prominent Hollywood couples in their Beverly Hills, Santa Monica homes. Extensive administrative duties included scheduling appointments, making travel arrangements, handling press requests, running errands. Frequent interaction w/accountants, lawyers, agents, people from all levels of restaurant, television, film & music industry. Coordinated household maintenance, including pet care, children’s activity, w/staff of nanny, housekeeper, gardener. Computer literate. Seasoned traveler. Excellent references. Please call 310-937-4775.

@normal:**POSITIVE CANINE OBEDIENCE TRAINING** Private Lessons w/experienced handler. Specialize in Work Breeds. Serving Malibu & Westside. Weekend & evening appointments. Vet recommended. Affordable Rates. 310-457-0635

@Header:Tennis

@normal:TENNIS ANYONE? Dry Gulch Ranch. Malibu Clay Court. A/B+ Players. Carter Ward 457-3807

@Header:Tile

@normal:TILE WORKS Ceramic, Pavers & Marble. 457-2031

@Header:Tree Service

@normal: RONN HAYES Skilled Arborist serving Malibu exclusively for 15 years. 457-7569

@Header:Yoga

@normal:**YOGA IN MALIBU** Take time for yourself….relaxing, rejuvenating, challenging. Rediscover your body & soul. Privates available in peaceful setting!! Call Kirschen (Certified Yoga Instructor) at 310-589-3916

On behalf of the Board of Directors of the Malibu Association Realtors, Inc., I am expressing our opposition to the proposed business license program for the city of Malibu as drafted by the Business Roundtable Subcommittee.

We understand that the objective of the meeting on Friday, November 6 is to vote on a recommendation to the City Council. Our Board Director, Kathryn Yarnell, Realtor, who is a member of the Business Roundtable, will represent the association’s views on our behalf at this meeting.

Through the California Association of Realtors, we have reviewed a great deal of research which was conducted statewide in 1997 on local business license taxes and its impact on local communities. The research indicates that many local governments have struggled to raise sufficient revenue to provide essential services. In the midst of this struggle, they often turn to methods and practices that are injurious to the real estate industry, business community and private property rights.

For the record, we oppose the proposed $50.00 annual fee for businesses either located in Malibu or located elsewhere and doing business in Malibu and the $25.00 annual fee for home-based businesses.

The above letter was sent to Mark Ball, chairman, Business Roundtable. We encourage all community members to voice your feelings by attending the meeting on Friday, Nov. 6 at 7:30 a.m. or contacting him by phone to express your views.

Beverly Taki, president

Malibu Association of Realtors, Inc.

Whenever I wake up on the morning of Nov. 3, my first conscious thought is to sniff the air and taste the moisture. I never worried about moisture before the Topanga/Malibu fire of November 1993. It didn’t matter because that kind of stuff happened to other people, not me. The Santa Anas weren’t personal, they were just a passing local weather phenomenon.

But in the course of one day, I lost my innocence and that comforting and totally irrational belief that these kinds of things happen only to the other guy, and I’ve never been the same since.

Five years ago today, even though the Santa Anas had been blowing and other neighborhoods like Laguna had already burned, it still came as a shock. It was like a death in the family. Even though someone may be old and sick, when death finally comes you’re always startled.

It had been several years since Malibu had a major fire. La Costa, the area where we live, hadn’t burned for 60 or 70 years and was overgrown with old vegetation, the kind of vines that take years to grow and ultimately envelope the buildings. Many of the houses were also old, with wooden siding and decks, and trees that brushed up against the buildings. The land around the buildings hadn’t been cleared of brush, and our water system was a travesty. There was little water pressure, and what storage there was for water high up in the hills was quickly used up. Nor could they refill the water storage tanks after they emptied — the pumps were electric, the electricity came from the same direction as the fire and the wires quickly burned out.

The hills were filled with dry brush, the fuel load was up and the plant moisture down. Years of wet winters had produced green springs and brown falls and winters, which left miles of kindling waiting for a spark.

Rambla Pacifico Road had always been the fire break, the last line of defense, the place where the fire trucks marshaled to make their stand, but that, too, was closed by a slide some years before.

The city was still very new, its disaster preparation practically nonexistent, its budget limited and its council and staff filled with unjustified confidence in themselves and their ability to protect us all.

All in all, the stage was set for tragedy, and none of us knew it.

It started with the early morning reports that Topanga and Calabasas were burning. Still it wasn’t real, even though it was coming our way and coming fast. A neighbor living on Las Flores Creek, a retired fireman, came into the Times building and told us he thought it was coming down Las Flores and it was time to clear out. We did. We took all the copy, grabbed the photographs, put the computers into our cars, parceled out the two Malibu Times cats, Fred and Ginger, and sent everyone home with instructions to come back the next day if the building was still standing or to stay by their phones for further instructions if it was not. At 2:30 in the afternoon, I left the Malibu Times building with Chris Ford, our then-editor, standing out front with a hose in his hand, watering down the roof, his silly parrot, Lola, sitting on his shoulder. I remember thinking as I pulled away, “Goodbye, Malibu Times.”

The shock came when I got back to La Costa and my entire neighborhood had already been evacuated.

Karen was in Orange County on business and couldn’t get back. The scene was surreal. The day was beautiful. The sky was blue, and the sun was shining. I stood on our deck, with our chocolate lab, Cece, by my side and watched the fire slowly moving towards our hill from Carbon Mesa Road, where it almost burned down the fire station. The strangest part is, the smoke was blowing west while the fire was burning east towards us.

I looked around. What do you take? I grabbed the hard disk from Karen’s computer, a few paintings from the wall, a couple of Oriental carpets that were rolled up and waiting to be taken to be cleaned. I looked for the family photos and couldn’t find them. Karen must have moved them, or perhaps I just never noticed. The Pathfinder was filling up, and I knew if the sheriffs came back, they’d throw me out. The fire kept moving closer but at a leisurely pace, and the sun was still shining, and the sky was still blue.

Then suddenly it changed. The air got dry, and you could feel the oxygen being sucked out of it. The fire was pushing a wind storm in front of it, and dust and paper and just about anything not tied down was swirling around. Cece started whining and finally growling at me. The message was clear: “Let’s get the hell out of here.” No valiant last stand by that dog, or, for that matter, me either. We got in the truck and down the hill we went. We tried to stop, but they wouldn’t let us. It was one long refugee train. They were sending us all in one direction, out of town.

That evening, we stayed at a friend’s house in Pacific Palisades, not knowing whether we still had a home or a business. Late that evening, our older son, Clay, called us from the Malibu Times building, which had survived. Somehow he had driven through the back hills, evaded the sheriffs and firemen, who would have thrown him out, and finally made his way to the neighborhood on foot. He told us it was all gone. Not just our house. Everything was gone. In fact, there were small fires and dying embers all over the hill and an occasional house that miraculously survived.

Now, five years later, the neighborhood is just beginning to come back, but most of the new houses still look pretty naked. The vegetation is not all back yet, and there are some burned out chimneys still standing like cemetery monuments. But the neighborhood is alive again, even though it’s not the same neighborhood nor, I suspect, are we the same people.

Welcome to Joycelyn Elder High School. We will be offering Masturbation 1A-1B for you as a freshman. We will hold rehearsal and practice sessions at lunch time and after school so you can perfect your technique. We are seriously considering co-ed competition in your junior and senior years. We are also considering college credit for those who demonstrate high levels of expertise in having sex with themselves. AP Masturbation, if you will. . . .

The centerpiece of self-described sex therapist Suzi Landolphi’s Sexplanations is everyone must learn to masturbate so you can enjoy the 2800 ways to reach orgasm without having actual sexual intercourse. This course may have been offered at Oxford when Bill Clinton was there, who knows? Suzi wants our children to have all the information whether they are ready or not (some kids are ready for sex information before others). Bill Clinton is one of our brightest intellectual minds; he has all of the sexual information as leader of the PC movement. When President Clinton laid back and prepared to become the most famous receiver of all time (and I don’t mean the NFL), all of his intelligence and information was rendered impotent. He exposed himself and his promiscuous (almost teen-age) partner to a plethora of possible diseases. The reason? He is a sexual addict.

Sending youngsters down this path of sex with oneself will insure we at Malibu High will create more sex addicts than we already have. What happened to hand holding, hugging, and a kiss on the cheek? Most, if not all, teen-age relations are mutual use. Boy uses girl for sex, girl uses sex for power in the relationship. They march off into the sunset thinking they are mutually desired, but instead, mutually deceived. Love is having a genuine caring for another’s welfare on this earth and watching out for them at all costs. One would not use one that they professed to have love for.

Where have all the heroes gone? Where have all the heroes gone? Tears of sadness come into my eyes when I ask the same question Sen. Robert Byrd asked in front of the Senate after President Clinton disclosed that he had lied to America for eight months about his sexual involvement with Monica Lewinsky. Our children are not only laughing at us, but I suspect they are contemptuous of us seeing that our only solution to teen pregnancy and STDs is a bouncing, middle-aged teen-ager telling us we must teach our children to masturbate. Surely we can do better!

Why don’t we have have classes on character, conduct, and consequences at Malibu High? There are programs out there to investigate, like “Choices,” that offer an alternative to the Landolphi method.

If some parents want this type of sex education, why can’t the assembly be held after school, on a minimum day or in the evening? This compromise would solve the problem to everyone’s satisfaction

And now back to the name changing ceremony from Malibu High School to Joycelyn Elders High School. . . . When they sing “God Bless America,” if it’s still permissible, I hope He still will.

Forrest Stewart

Sexplanations is a short cut to everything for local schools while to other Malibuites the short cut is the reopening of Pacific Coast Highway. I heretofore declare Nov. 12 (reopening of PCH day) a Malibu day of liberation. Visitors will return. City coffers will once again be full. Remember, Malibu is a place where visitors from Iowa mistake each other for movie stars.

Tom Fakeheny