The universal language of motherhood


    An individual who does not love their mother must lead a horribly, tormented life. With the recent departure of the last Mothers Day of the 21st Century, I recognize that their mother’s voice, wisdom and common sense guide Malibuites. Whether we remember what she said, fondly or try to forget these phrases, they are apart of us. Categorically, without even realizing it we pass them along to our children, who will in most likelihood, pass them on to their offspring.

    Here are a few of the phrases that I remember, but feel free to add your own!

    Stop frowning, someday your face will freeze like that!

    What if everyone jumped off a cliff would you do it, too?

    You’re going to put your eye out with that thing!

    How many times do I have to tell you don’t throw things in the house!

    Close the door behind you were you born in a barn?

    Don’t put that in your mouth you don’t know where it’s already been.

    Eat those carrots, they’re good for your eyes. Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?”

    Did you flush?

    There’s enough dirt in those ears to grow potatoes!

    I don’t care what “everyone” is doing. I care what you are doing!

    If you can’t say something nice don’t say anything at all.

    I hope someday that you have children just like you.

    Don’t talk with your mouth full!

    Always put on clean underwear in the morning, in case you’re in an accident.

    I’m not just talking to hear myself talk.

    I’m going to give you until the count of three.

    And last but not least, my personal favorite:

    “I love you!”

    Tom Fakehany