Blog: She Certainly Can

Burt Ross

We have wimps in our midst right here in Malibu. Yes, you heard me correctly—wimps. The other day, I heard a woman complain that it was too hot outside. At the time it was exactly 75 degrees with a mild ocean breeze. That is not hot. That is perfect weather, and why many of us live here in Malibu.                        

We have become spoiled. Back in July, there was one day when virtually the entire country experienced weather over 90 degrees, and in more than a few places, triple-digit weather reigned. On that day, Malibu’s weather hit a high of 68 degrees.

Our country is not the only place where people suffered a heat wave last month. Most of Europe experienced a record-breaking heat wave. Parts of Europe actually reached 107 degrees, and Paris at 105 degrees was so hot the Eiffel Tower started to melt. (I made up that part about the Eiffel Tower. The Devil made me do it. I just couldn’t resist. That is a perfect example of fake news.)

I imagine by this time you might be wondering what all these heatwaves have to do with the title of this blog “She Certainly Can.” You might be asking, “Who is she and what can she do?” Stay tuned.

In the 1930s (yes, something actually happened before my time), Irving Berlin wrote the lyrics to the song “Heat Wave.” Whenever I hear the word “heatwave,” I have no choice but to sing: 

Oh! We’re having a heatwave, a tropical heatwave

The temperature’s rising, it isn’t surprising,

She certainly can can-can

She started a heatwave by letting her seat wave,

In such a way that the customers say

That she certainly can can-can

So now you know that the sexy lady who can wave her seat can do the can-can. Trust me on this one, any person who knows these lyrics is either a music aficionado or a bit on the ancient side. Unfortunately, I fall in the latter category.

Finally, for those of you who are finding Malibu uncomfortably warm, you might consider moving to Anchorage, Alaska, although it reached 90 degrees there on July 4.