Another gated community

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    They win again. They win by wear and tear. The Malibu City Council’s televised meetings are so composed of fragments and so exhausting to grasp, that the city council meetings ingenuously exasperate the viewer. I remember an allegory I heard a few years ago about being ingenuously exasperated that relates to the current council agendas.

    It seems that Forrest Gump died and went to heaven. When he got to the Pearly Gates Saint Peter told him that additional heavenly rules were in effect (similar to the ever changing procedures in Malibu). In order to gain admittance a prospective heavenly soul must answer three questions.

    1. Name two days of the week that begin with “T.”

    2. How many seconds are in a year?

    3. What is God’s first name?

    Forrest thought for a few minutes and answered:

    1. The two days of the week that begin with “T” are Today and Tomorrow.”

    2. There are 12 seconds in a year.”

    3. God has two first names and they are Andy and Howard.”

    “OK,” said Saint Peter. “I understand Today and Tomorrow. But how do you figure there are 12 seconds in a year?”

    Forrest responded, “Well, January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, etc….”

    “OK, I give,” said Saint Peter, “but what about the God’s first name stuff?”

    Forrest said, “Well, from the song! Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, Andy tells me I am his own…? And the prayer… Our Father who art in Heaven Howard be thy name….”

    Saint Peter let him in without further ado and wouldn’t you have also? They wear us down and we no longer care that Malibu was created for the citizens of Malibu and not the other way around. By the way, am I really to get a Malibu City permit to prune my fruit trees this winter or should I just let them die from lack of water when the water line fails again?

    Tom Fakehany