I hate to be a spoilsport, a party pooper or rain on anyone’s parade, but the amount of money being spent on inauguration festivities this week is giving me hives. If we hadn’t just been deluged here in the Golden State, I’d do a rain dance.
How many ways can we say excessive? How many ways can we, as a nation, display vulgar, over-the-top, tacky taste in celebration of a divisive electoral victory?
True, Bush’s second election had a bit more legitimacy than his first, which was celebrated with $30 million in donations, a sizable portion from disgraced Enron executive Ken Lay. The balance was paid by taxpayers to the tune of $8 million.
This year, we’re told the Presidential Inaugural Committee aims to raise $40 million in private money, but was still short less than a week before the event. How much can it cost to produce nine fancy dress balls, one teen rock concert, three candlelight dinners, an inaugural eve gala, a lavish brunch for dignitaries (whoever they are) and a parade? Of course, construction of the largest-ever inaugural stand, to which 250,000 spectators will look during the swearing-in, takes a sizable chunk. And what will become of this architectural blight on the Pennsylvania Avenue landscape after the ceremony? Will it be dismantled beam-by-beam and stored somewhere for four years? Dissembled for reconstruction as housing for the poor? Stacked as a bonfire to warm D.C.’s homeless population for a night? Shipped to Texas for inclusion in the eventual Bush presidential library? And who foots the bill for that cross-country schlep?
The part that galls the most, however, is the estimated $17.3 million of taxpayer money being spent, most of which is earmarked for security. I thought we were supposed to be safer now that Saddam is deposed? Is this money coming from local law enforcement budgets or out of the Homeland Security budget, which still hasn’t coughed up enough to secure our ports, our borders, our atomic energy plants? And check the word estimate. If it follows estimates for Iraq and Medicare, we’re in big trouble.
Presidents past have drastically scaled down inaugural hoopla during wartime-even during popular and necessary wars. Yet our ruling party will be spending more than what it takes to sustain its misguided adventure in Iraq for a day. I’d rather they spent that $40 million on armor for 690 Humvees.
All this accounted for, the big bash is expected to boost the local economy: hotels, caterers, florists, limo drivers. Oh, and maybe 10,000 or so business class airline tickets to aid the floundering carriers. Tuxedos, ball gowns, dry cleaners; the largess trickles down to the ordinary folks, who share in the cost through payroll taxes even though they will find no invitations to the ball in their mailbox.
So far, the biggest donor is the energy industry. Well, they haven’t given up on their own private energy bill even though Congress rejected the blatant give-away last year. They’re hoping their donations will help resurrect the plan in bits and pieces attached to unrelated “must-pass” legislation like the upcoming budget appropriations bill. Aren’t all the energy barons and chemical manufacturers and drug company executives sufficiently worried about their own mortality to contribute a little extra to cover security costs-say one metal detector, or scanner, or pat-down officer or purse inspector? You know, the guy who confiscates your nail file and nose hair clippers.
Party operatives claim all this partying is necessary to pay back those who donated to the campaign. Like this is the only payback they’re expecting? Come on. Their corporations will be paid back in hundreds of ways both great and small. Every plan proposed by Bush and Cheney will contain gifts of appreciation to those generous supporters of their campaign. They don’t need to dine on shrimp (from Asia), or domestic Champagne.
If only this were a class act. The A-list party is the Texas Black Tie and Boots Ball with Lyle Lovett entertaining. Guests will be served enough sat-fat laden brisket to clog Cheney’s stent. Dessert will probably be mud pie, or whatever is the Texas equivalent of chocolate éclairs and pots d’creme (currently out of favor because, duh, they’re French). C’este dommage, no fromage blanc. If Kraft Foods were a big donor, would the dip be made of CheezWiz?
Well, thank heavens someone was on the ball, seeing that Kid Rock would not be given a platform for his raunchy rock/rap lyrics (reportedly denigrating the presidential mom). Who put him on the performers’ list anyway?
Whew! Now all Barbara and George have to worry about is the Bush twins hosting the rock concert. Pray for a TV blackout.