Letter: Chasing the Vaccine

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Letter to the Editor

Until this week, Malibu may be the hardest place in the U.S. to find a COVID-19 Vaccine shot. We’ve got all the elements lined up against us: 

An educated population. An affluent population. Few chain stores—no Walgreens, Walmarts, etc. No large public facilities like a sports stadium or county fairgrounds. No hospitals, et al.

No problemo. I’ll just go onto the web and find my shot the old fashioned way, driving mile after mile to find basic goods and services. Hmm, what site to choose: Wait my Turn, Wait your Turn. CVS, Kaiser, Caesar, St Johns, St Judes. St. Jews? They all go nowhere because nobody with single-digit humidity and low MAGA rates has any shots anytime soon. Especially the much sought-after J and J vaccine, which gets you very sick—with only one dose.

The only helpful source turns out to be Homer’s Ancient Greek text and vaccine finder.

The directions couldn’t be more succinct:

“You must travel inland from the sea, until you find a land whose inhabitants cannot tell the difference between an oar and a winnowing fan.”

Bingo! I found my place, my shot. Simi Valley, here I come….

Dan Bercu