I am not a “Malibu mom,” but if I were, I would be offended by the comments made by Cindy Vandor in your recent article reporting her arrest.
Her actions in the matter should sadden and educate moms everywhere. Using her community name and vehicle make as some sort of threat of retaliation toward law enforcement is pathetic. Is there something about Malibu that we don’t know.
I would have thought being in journalism and an educator that Mrs. Vandor’s mind would be a tad bit more open. She made a bad choice and had difficulty accepting it. Would a few more steps from a general parking space been so difficult? Lesson #1 – don’t set examples for your children that it’s okay to take short cuts. Then she made the matter considerably worse by thinking she had some kind of “special clout” to take the officer out of her ticket. When that didn’t work, she taught her son it’s okay to throw a tantrum when things don’t go his way.
Sometimes life isn’t exactly fair, and maybe it was a little “petty” of the officer to write her up, she wasn’t exactly hurting anyone, right? Lesson #2 – don’t teach your kids it’s okay to cheat “a little” and try to justify it when you get caught. Imagine just for a moment a couple of scenarios. “I wasn’t really cheating on my exam. I was just looking at my classmate’s test paper.” Or, “I wasn’t really drinking and driving, I just drank one beer after school.” Or, “I wasn’t really going to steal that candy bar, I was just seeing if it fit into my backpack.” If she really thought about it, I’m sure Ms. Vandor would see the correlation.
The really sad part is that Mrs. Vandor is teaching her son these lessons, and he’s listening. Your article quoted her son as saying “everybody in the shopping center didn’t agree with the officers.” Mrs. Vandor has missed the point, and now her son has, too. As an outsider, I think it’s pretty clear that the situation was not about inappropriate behavior of the officers, but her unwillingness to accept her mistake and take the consequences. Learning the consequences of negative behavior is a very crucial aspect of preparing children for responsible adulthood.
I hope Mrs. Vandor will teach her son and her community another lesson by forgetting the high-powered attorney she will undoubtedly hire and drop her complaint against the officers.
I think all of us would like to be reminded that it’s fairly human to be wrong occasionally, as long as you accept the consequences, learn your lesson. . . and don’t keep making the same mistakes over and over.
Gloria Hao